Oh Father, Give Me Grace to Forgive Them

Cause I Feel Like the One Losing

It's hard to believe that I am almost twenty-two. Honestly, the years have flown by. That sounds cliche, but the truth remains. Life passes so fast.  However old you are, however young you are, there are still so many things to learn. Personally, I struggle with one distinct lesson: Forgiveness.

It is so hard to continue to forgive someone when they personally attack you. How can I forgive someone who has, on multiple occasions, said things to break me?

I'm not going to go into the situation because honestly, what good would that do? But regardless, why is it that people who claim truth are the ones living differently behind closed doors? I am no righteous person, and I am no better. But it is so hard to forgive and forgive and forgive to be broken and torn down again and again.

There are days when all I can say is, "I am tired of being put down by this girl." And then I remember the sacrifice. Jesus was probably tired of hanging on a cross so that I might live. Jesus preached to his disciples the reason for forgiving others.

You have heard that it was said, "Love you neighbor and hate your enemy." But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even the pagans do that? Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect. -Matthew 5:42-48

 Even after reading this again, I still feel so much conviction. How could I not forgive, knowing what Jesus did for me and for you? It reminds me of the Parable of the unmerciful servant.

Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, "Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?" Jesus answered, "I tel you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times. Therefore, the kingdom of heaven is like a king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. As he began the settlement, a man who owed him ten thousand bags of gold was brought to him. Since he was not able to pay, the master ordered that he and his wife and children and all he had be sold to repay the debt. At this the servant fell on his knees before him, 'Be patient with me,' he begged, 'and I will pay back everything.' The servant's master took pity on him, canceled his debts, and let him go. But when that servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred silver coins. He grabbed him and began to choke him. 'Pay back what you owe me!' he demanded. His fellow servant fell to his knees and begged him, 'Be patient with me, and I will pay it back.' But he refused. Instead, he went off and had the man thrown into a prison until he could pay the debt. When the other servants saw what had happened, they were outraged and went and told their master everything that had happened. Then the master called the servant in. 'You wicked servant,' he said, 'I canceled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. Shouldn't you have mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?' In anger his master handed him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed. This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brothers or sisters from your heart." -Matthew 18:21-35

I do not want to be an unforgiving person. I know how hard it is to forgive someone who purposely hurts you, who goes out of their way to upset you. But forgiveness is necessary. How do you expect God to forgive you of your sins if you cannot forgive a brother or sister for theirs?

In 'Crazy Love,' a book by Francis Chan, he talks about what a lukewarm christian is. My favorite part is this:

Lukewarm people love others but do not seek to love others as much as they love themselves. Their love of others is typically focused on those who love them in return, like family, friends, and other people they know and connect with. There is little love left over for those who cannot love them back, much less for those who intentionally slight them. Their love is highly conditional and very selective, and generally comes with strings attached.

Have you ever drank lukewarm coffee? It's terrible. On the contrary, coffee that is hot or iced coffee is quite good. Most people either prefer their coffee really hot or iced. No one chooses to have coffee that is just kind of hot. It is the same for God. It clearly states in Revelation that God will spit those who are lukewarm out of His mouth. I know that I do not want to live a lukewarm life. I want to live boldly before Christ so that every person I come in contact with knows that I bear His fruit. I want strangers to see something different about me, even before I open my mouth.

It is hard, this forgiveness thing. I am struggling with it now. I have struggled with it for years, and I know that I will continue to struggle with it. But if we choose to make strides in God's direction, He will help us through our weaknesses.

I think this video says it all. If you haven't heard the 'behind the song,' I would encourage you to look it up.



Show me how to love the unlovable.
Show me how to reach the unreachable.
Help me now to do the impossible.

It'll clear the bitterness away
It can even set a prisoner free
There is no end to what it's power can do
So, let it go and be amazed by what you see through eyes of grace
The prisoner it really frees is YOU.


Blessings.